Here I am, starting again. In October 2009 I decided to start a blog about reading called English Major’s Junk Food. It was successful, and I was amazed. I became addicted to blogging and worked hard to make that book blog everything it was. I worked on projects, participated in challenges, attended Book Expo America, and made some amazing friends. But over the last six months my life has taken some big turns and I’ve struggled to only write about books. No matter how much support my book blogging friends offer for me changing the subjects I write about on my blog, it just doesn’t feel right to me. I just can’t open up my book blog and write about my wedding, or running, or whatever else. This struggle with my book blog has made it difficult for me to even read. So today, finally, I’m cutting myself off from it. I have several reasons why this needs to happen.

Tornado damage in Mississippi. Sometimes new things are born out of death.

The first of which is that I miss blogging. I love blogging and I love sharing everything I think with the world, whether they care about it or not. I miss seeing what all my friends are up to all around the world. I miss being really pissed or excited about something and just cracking open the laptop and letting go. That is probably what I miss most.

I’m not the same person I was when I started English Major’s Junk Food. That person was in the depths of college, focusing on her English major, even considering graduate school in English or library science. Waking up on a Saturday morning and reading was my idea of a perfect day back then, and while I still love reading, I have other interests now. When I started English Major’s Junk Food I was at a very lonely place in my life, I didn’t feel like I had many friends and I was generally fine with staying home all the time. I was kind of unhappy. When my blog took off that brought so much joy into my life, and through that I made friends online and in real life. I will never regret starting English Major’s Junk Food simply for that reason. It got me out of my shell and out in the real world, even if it was mostly behind a computer screen to start.

I need a fresh start, a place for the new me to write. I need this. Even though my old blog domain has a strong readership and a backlog of posts, it wouldn’t be right to carry on there. I know those who really care to read what I write will follow me here. And those are really the only people who matter to me. It might take energy and time, but I accept that. I’m ready to see where this will take me.

I just started touring last year. It was on a whim that I forced Jason to do Tour the Raccoon, a 120 mile weekend ride from Des Moines to Jefferson, Iowa. I saw a post about in on Twitter and thought, “Hey, I’m not doing anything that weekend.” It seemed like a good training ride for RAGBRAI.

That bike tour was miserable. My seat was incredibly uncomfortable, we didn’t stop enough, we only focused on getting to the destination, I got an absolutely horrible sunburn, and heading back into Des Moines we faced terrible winds. And I lost my necklace. Not to mention that Jefferson has nothing, and nothing was open so I couldn’t get anything to relieve my sunburn. I slept in my tent all night in pain. Then got up the next day and rode sixty miles.

There were so many times on that tour where I just wanted to quit, give up, say no thanks. And Jason offered several times to call our parents, just have them come get us. Even though that’s what I wanted more than anything, I kept saying no. In my gut I knew that if I did not finish that tour I would regret it.

I’m so glad I finished that bike tour because it made me much more prepared for RAGBRAI and it taught me a lot of things about myself and life. Like the following.

1. I am stubborn. If I set out to do something I will do it.
2. Sometimes you have to stop along the way before you reach your destination.
3. You can be as strong as you want to be.
4. Not everything is a race.

Through that horrible, awful experience I really fell in love with bike touring. I learned what not to do and from there I just loved it. I’m so excited to tour in some new states with different scenery!

Results
Time: 29 minutes and 27 seconds
Place Overall: 402/970
Place Overall Women: 182/571
Place Age Group: 19/62

All of that explains the big smile on my face.

Basically I was in the top third, but I didn’t know that until later in the day. After the run I went home and out for lunch with my parents and Jason, and I was thrilled to have just finished. It was freezing cold outside and several people didn’t come to the race.

Before the race there was a lot of standing around inside the YMCA thinking about the race. My stomach was doing its own little workout, flipping around like a dolphin. Jason helped take my mind off things a bit, talking to me every once in a while. Five minutes before race time everyone left the warm lobby to stand at the starting line. I jumped up and down, ran in place, and then crossed the starting line. It was a rush at the beginning. I passed several people, but tried to run at a comfortable pace and not focus too much on speed. Jason popped up along the course every once in a while to take a picture of me on his iPod, and seeing him along the way gave me extra motivation. After all, I didn’t want him to take a picture of me walking and out of breath.

Not a super flattering picture of me, but the only one where my face is visible.

It all went by so fast, and when I could see the finish line I couldn’t help but think about all the runs I went on before this point. How I started out just running for thirty seconds and here I was, running for thirty minutes. I thought about all the weight I’ve lost along the way (more on that later). I thought about all those times I dreaded running the mile in school, and how amazed my gym teaches would be to see me out there running with a smile on my face. And even though it’s kind of embarrassing and I realize three miles is no big deal for a lot of people, I kind of felt like I might cry. I picked up my pace a bit and run across the finish line. I took off my chip, turned around, and walked towards the YMCA.

I’m already signed up for two more runs, one in March and one in June, and I’m starting Bridge to 10K. I think this one will always be special to me, and I was so glad it was in Downtown Des Moines. I think that just added to the rush for me. Here I was running by these places, these landmarks of my life. I ran by the State Historical Society (where I used to work) and the Capitol (a pretty noticeable landmark), and all of these other places I drove by all the time. It was pretty incredible.

If you’re a runner, do you remember your first race? Are any of you training for an upcoming event?

I gave up shampoo.

This was my second attempt at “no poo,” as it’s so lovingly referred to. I tried at the same time last year when Jason and I went backpacking in Europe. I’m not really sure why I tried to do it on a trip both times, I think it had something to do with already looking grungy on vacation. But this time, mostly because I had no access to other hair cleaning methods, I actually quit shampoo.

I’ve read several posts from green bloggers about ditching shampoo, so I won’t link to them all here. I’ll just say that if your interested after my post there is a TOn of information about no poo online, so go exploring.

The first couple of weeks were pretty bad. My hair was already greasy before I gave up shampoo and I had to shampoo every single day. This was part of the reason I quit shampoo. My hair was so dependent on shampoo (which is basically detergent for your hair, it completely strips all the natural oils out of it) that if I washed in the morning it would be greasy by the evening. It was just awful. I hated it. So you can imagine that when I quit shampoo the grease build up was pretty gross. I hate wearing my hair up, but that’s what I did every day for two weeks.

This is me, greasing it up about a week and a half into this.

And let’s keep in mine that was in a foreign country with a bunch of people I’d never met before. But somehow I still made friends, and no one caught on to my greasy hair. I was washing with baking soda and water, about one tablespoon of baking soda per one cup of water. I squirted it straight on my scalp and then scratched it in with fingers. Then rinsed. 

But I found that while my hair felt clean from the baking soda, it wasn’t soft or shiny like it would be after washing with shampoo. It was really tangly and just did not look clean at all. That’s when I did a bit more digging on the Internet.  I have a lot of hair, but it’s pretty fine, and it seems that the baking soda and water technique just isn’t enough for us fine haired folks. That’s when I bought some apple cider vinegar to use as a conditioner. I took capfuls of vinegar and applied to my hair, first at the scalp, and then throughout my ends. It depends on the cap size, but I find about five to six capfuls is plenty. 

And once I started using the vinegar my hair was looking a lot better. Like, a lot better, even better than it did when I was using shampoo. It was incredibly soft, very wavy, and over time it seems like my hair is growing even faster than it was before.

This is my hair after just a few days of apple cider vinegar.

Now I’ve been off shampoo for about six weeks and I can’t imagine going back. My hair feels healthier and stronger, and as I said earlier it’s growing faster, but the best part is that I can go about three days without washing. Sure, I shower, but I just rub the water into my hair and that’s it. Even after working out this works. This means I’m washing my hair about twice a week, as opposed to the every day washes I was doing before. This means I’m spending less time in the shower, therefore wasting less water. I’m also using far less packaging every year by using baking soda and apple cider vinegar to wash my hair. 

This is my hair today, although not the greatest photo since it was taken inside.

Of course, reading it in India was also an absolutely horrible idea because it made me want to run all the time. I would read and just feel my legs pulsing, wanting to run so much. The roads in India, at least where I was, were just not safe for running. It wasn’t even an option. So I lived through Christopher McDougall’s story and thought every day about how excited I was to run when I got back to Iowa.

So, back to the book for a bit. It’s the story of McDougall’s search for the Tarahumara Indians in Mexico’s Copper Canyons. This tribe is known for running hundreds of miles, barefoot, and never growing tired or getting injured. They are the ultimate superathletes. McDougall weaves this story into stories of ultramarathon runners in North America, whose stories are equally fascinating. What I loved about this book was that it separated running from a sport or chore we do to lose weight and running for joy. Running because that is what we are meant to do. We are drawn to do it.

There is also a lot of science behind running and McDougall writes about the anatomy of our feet in a way anyone can understand. And he really makes the case for barefoot running, mostly because as a runner he had a slew of foot problems and looked to barefoot as the solution.

I’m talking a lot about running, but there is more to this book. I think what I loved most about it was the writing style. It’s a nonfiction book, but the story and style almost reminded me of Jack Kerouac. I don’t think you have to like Jack Kerouac to like this book, and I doubt most people would even connect the two, but if you like stories about wild trips, crazy parties, and soul then you will love Born to Run. I think you’ll love it whether you’re a runner or not, and maybe by the end you’ll decide to run.

“You don’t stop running because you get old, you get old because you stop running.” 

So, I’ve been back from India for about a week and a half now and I’ve had three runs. The first one was tough, really tough, because I hadn’t run in about a month. I was afraid I’d have to start all over again, but I was happy to find that running is a lot like biking. You don’t really forget how to do it. That first run I could only go 23 minutes and a couple of miles. Part of the problem was when I first went out to run I was so excited to run. I probably ran faster than I should have and this contributed to me tiring out.

Two days later I went for a run and my goal was simply to run longer than I did the first time. I went for 27 minutes and felt pretty good. I wasn’t focusing on speed, just on getting the time in and overall it was pretty successful. Just last night I went for my third run and it was amazing.

Probably the best run I’ve ever been on.

No, it wasn’t fast. I averaged a little less than 11 minutes per mile. But it was consistent, and after about ten minutes of running my legs were just set in motion. It was almost like I couldn’t stop running. I ran for 33 minutes and for the first time ever, in my life, ran three miles. I felt amazing and when Jason asked me how I was I just grinned.

The thing about running is that it’s not something I was ever good at and it’s not something I ever thought I would do. So when I do it and I do well it’s the best feeling in the world. It makes me feel fearless–if I can do something I never thought I would do and have success at it, then what else could I do if I got over the mental hurdle of I can’t do this?

And that’s what’s really stuck with me from Born to Run. Running is all about mental hurdles. The truth is that all of us are able to run and the human body is capable of amazing things if you just allow yourself to believe. So when I’m running and I feel tired, I just go back to Born to Run and think about everything that book taught me about the human body and our minds. Instead of focusing on how tired I feel or I can’t do this, I think about that book and things seem within reach. There aren’t many books that can give you that feeling, which is why I think this is worth reading.

The Adivasis in Wayanad primarily lived in the forest, but when the government tore down the natural trees and replaced them with trees that produced more pulp the Adivasis lost their food source and natural habitat. They didn’t live like the rest of us, they didn’t own land, they didn’t have jobs. Everything they needed was in the forest. Now they eat rice once or twice a day and the increasing exposure to chemicals and pesticides is difficult for them to adapt to. There are several new diseases showing up in the Adivasi community, including cancer and sickle cell anemia. One boy we met was eight years old but he looked like he was four.

We took this jeeps part of the way into the forest, but after a while they could go no further and we had to walk for ten to twenty minutes on rocky, hilly terrain. It was fun for us, but I can’t imagine having to walk through those forests when I was sick to get to the hospital. The people in the forest would need to walk three times as far as we did just to get to town, then continue walking to get to a hospital.

I loved speaking with these people because it was less like an interview than a conversation. They were all very open and honest about their struggles and had several questions about what home was like for us in Iowa. The strangest thing for me is that communities like these exist. There are people living in huts in the forest. It’s easy to ignore when you’re living in the United States and everyone has already been integrated into the mainstream, but these people are just now being integrated into the mainstream.

The saddest thing for me is that this culture is slowly going away. The last parts of the world that have been “untouched” by modernity are now being pushed into the mainstream. All of this knowledge about how to live healthfully and naturally is disappearing as we continue to consume our processed food and gasoline.

Going to Wayanad has forever changed me. I might not have seen very many tourist destinations during my time in India, but the experience I had is worth so much more. I can’t wait to see how everything I learned will change my lifestyle when I get back to Iowa.

Tomorrow I’m leaving for Wayanad, and honestly, I’m incredibly overwhelmed. I’m in a foreign country, working on a film (something I know very little about), about the Avidasi community (something I didn’t even know existed until I arrived). I feel completely out of my element. After discussing this film idea with my partner and our instructors I felt even more overwhelmed because there are so many steps to this project and we’re completing it in such a short amount of time. But, before I became too overwhelmed, I considered this trip.

I made the decision to come to India in September and as my departure approached in December there were several steps. I had to attend orientation, get a Visa, buy a plane ticket, pack, exchange money, the list went on and on. The only thing that kept me sane was having a checklist. I refrain from using the word plan because plans are restricting and I feel they inhibit flexibility and creativity. I might go on a trip without a plan, but I’d never leave without a checklist.

A checklist alone was not enough, of course. I talked to friends who had been to India, faculty working on this trip, and anyone who would help me with my packing list and other tasks. I relied on all of these people to get me to my final destination, and without them the overwhelmingness of this trip might have stopped me.

And that would have been a shame, because just yesterday I did something I never imagined I would do. I climbed a coconut tree. At the bottom of the tree I was terrified, but as I began working up I realized it wasn’t so scary. I didn’t feel like I was going to throw up anymore, and I realized that climbing the tree was actually pretty fun. I even felt like I was kind of good at climbing the tree. The whole walk to the tree I said, “I can’t do this, I’ll never be able to climb this.” And the whole way back I said, “I can’t believe I did that.” The one thing that helped me get up that tree was faith. Faith in myself and the faith all the people around me had.

So while this project seems terrifying and impossible right now, I worked out a script with Bryan. We have a list of questions, shots we want to take, and how we want to order our documentary. I have Bryan, who knows about films, and others around to help me through the process and I know once we filming things won’t seem so overwhelming and scary. And by the time this is over I’ll be able to say, “Yeah, I did that.” I know from experience that’s the best feeling in the world.

–Ash Bruxvoort

Visthar is a totally different world from Bangalore, and it wasn’t until the third day that we really experienced Bangalore. On the third day we took an “alternate” tour of Bangalore. We each had 30 rupees and that was all the money we could spend to pay for our breakfast and lunch. Thirty rupees is the average amount an Indian spends each day. This was supposed to help us understand life for an average Indian more, and put our analysis of  of their economy and lifestyle into perspective for the rest of our time. After taking a bus from Visthar to Bangalore (which was paid for outside the thirty rupees we each had) we had breakfast (10 rupees) and got on another bus (one again paid for outside the thirty rupees) to the first part of our tour. We visited a slum, which I immediately felt uncomfortable with. I’ve always felt very awkward about “poverty tourism.” I want to visit places like India and Africa, but at the same time I want to remain respectful of the people around me.

We weren’t allowed to take photographs while we walked through the slum, which I think was a great choice on our tour guide’s part. While I love taking photos, having a camera in front of your face puts a physical barrier between you and the person or place you’re viewing. Instead of taking pictures, our guide from Visthar talked with several people in the slum, many he already knew, and asked them questions about how much money they make, what their cultural background was, and about the work they were doing. One woman who ironed clothing had three sons and two of them were going to college for engineering. One person from our group asked if there was any way to get out of the slums, and our guide said the two sons going to school had a much better chance.

After walking through the slum we visited a mall, mere minutes away from the slum, where there were expensive stores on every floor and several people shopping. Needless to say, nothing in that mall was 30 rupees, not even a soda. Everything was cold and generic, and the people there were concerned with their own shopping and selves, while the people in the slums offered us tea even though they had very little.

This experience perfectly sums up my understanding of India. There are vast extremes, and really India is made up of several completely different worlds. There are the people who live in the slums with very little, working very hard for what they do have, alongside the people who have a great deal. Even though these people live in completely different worlds right next to each other, their worlds cannot exist without each other. The wealthy can buy the goods in the mall because they are made by the people in the slums, but the people in the slums survive off the jobs created by the needs and wants of the wealthy.

This is a very informal challenge and we’re both approaching it different ways. The main goal is to read one essay every day in 2012. I’ll obviously highlight my favorite essays in my Awesome Essays posts, but I anticipate loving more than one essay every week, so I also plan on doing a wrap-up post every month where I highlight the best essays I read. I’ll also review all the essay collections I read once I finish them.

Essays are fantastic–throughout this semester I’ve turned to them in times when I just couldn’t pick up a book. I hope this project will be the beginning of a lifelong habit where reading essays is an even more important part of my reading life.

The project starts on January 1st and runs through December 31st, be sure to run over to Kim’s blog and check out her plans as well. Anyone is welcome to join in with this challenge at whatever level of commitment you want. We’re just trying to encourage people to try an essay!

If you’re interested in this project and think you might want to read some essays, you might want to check out the 2012 Essay Challenge at Books and Movies. Carrie does this every year and I always take part even though I’m not very good at writing about it.

Do you have any great essays or collections I should read in 2012? Let me know!